'Horror' show: Notes against a 'Rocky' remake, as such ...

• Author: Infante, Victor D.
• Position: Living - Movie review

Byline: Victor D. Infante

Few ideas have been shouted down as loudly online as the prospect of Fox's proposed TV movie remake of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show'' ... particularly by fans of the original 1975 classic that starred Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon and Barry Bostwick in an absurd and cheeky musical sex romp with an alien transvestite mad scientist and his "monster.''

"Rocky Horror'' has been a staple of midnight screenings for decades now, with actors imitating the action on the screen while the movie plays and audience members shouting jokes and throwing things. It's basically mayhem, but it would seem that the remake of the movie would have a built-in fan base, especially as those who were sneaking out to see the midnight Saturday-night screenings near the beginning of the phenomenon are now old enough to take their kids, and frequently do. Why isn't this idea catching on?

It's just a jump to the left

The first problem, and it's a doozey, is this: "Rocky'' fans might love the movie, but not because it's a fantastic work of cinema. In all honesty, "Rocky'' is kind of terrible. While the performances are surprisingly good, there's enough scenery chewing to open a restaurant. And as magnetic as Curry is in the role of Dr. Frank N. Furter, even he can't keep the second half of the film from dragging. The plot makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, and. frankly, if you're not in a crowded theater with scantily clad people dancing and throwing things, you could be easily forgiven for not getting what anyone sees in this hot mess. Honestly, even I usually leave after "Sweet Transvestite'' if I go these days.

And that's the crux of the problem: "Rocky'' is the catalyst for a scene. Whole communities have built up around the movie, making the live experience of engaging with the film fun and compelling. It's a group activity, not one for your living room (or worse, one for your tablet.) A big part of the appeal is the shared experience.

Another step to the right

In most discussions of the "Rocky'' remake, the motivation seems to be to cash in on the TV "musical'' phenomenon, which has largely centered on such straight-laced family fare as "The Sound of Music'' and "Peter Pan.'' Entertainment Weekly points out that Fox is looking to secure the supremacy it once had with musicals, back in the heyday of "Glee.''

Anyone who saw the "Rocky Horror'' episode of "Glee,'' however, can tell you just how out of whack that logic is. While "Glee'' was...