Don't bother calling this number.

PositionENTERTAINMENT - Movie review

Byline: Daniel M. Kimmel

COLUMN: Movie Review

Let's see. The movie is opening on Friday, and Friday has six letters. If they do shows at 7 and 10, that adds up to 17 and plus 6 is 23. And it's the 23rd of February. And George W. Bush is president, and W is the 23rd letter. See, it's everywhere!

If you're already bored by such nonsense, imagine sitting through an hour and a half of this drivel. In the new movie "The Number 23," briefly visiting local theaters, Jim Carrey plays Walter Sparrow, an animal control officer with a loving wife, Agatha (Virginia Madsen), and teenage son (Logan Lerman) saddled with the ridiculous name Robin Sparrow. By chance, as a birthday present, Agatha picks up a used book called "The Number 23."

The novel is an incoherent story of an aspiring detective, visited by mysterious deaths, and with a strange linkage to the number 23. Naturally Walter comes to the conclusion that in spite of obvious differences (for instance, he chases animals, not murder clues), the book is really about him. This goes from passing fancy to monomaniacal obsession, and is not helped by another unexplained delusion that his wife is romantically interested in an old friend (Danny Huston).

The problem, as you may have already...

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